Let’s be real.

Single momming is exhausting.
Having a partner and then suddenly doing it on your own is scary.
There are some really hard falls that are hard to get back up from.
Failure takes a whole new meaning.

Failure means homelessness.
Failure means not having food to eat.
And I’ll be honest when there were times in my singleness when I was right on the cusp of facing either of those situations but God managed to pull me through.

I also faced depression.
The days where, “What’s the point?” would float in my head.
The days where I didn’t want to get out of bed just to do the same thing over again and go nowhere in life.

But this one little word would re-ignite the flame in my inner warrior.
I believe we all have that warrior inside us.
We all have a fighting spirit.
And this word would have my inner-Goddess on standby, ready to fight back whatever life is throwing at me.

The word is, “So?”
It can sound condescending but seriously, “So?”

I’m depressed. So? What are you going to do about it?
I’m behind with bills again. So? What are you going to do about it?
My love life is trash. So? What are you going to do about it?
My life is stale. I’m not going anywhere. So? What are you going to do about it?
I’m tired. So?
I want to quit. So?
I hate my life. SO?

I always tell people this – You have no idea how powerful you are.

God didn’t create us to be helpless.
He created us IN HIS LIKENESS.
It’s not to say that we are God.

But what I’m trying to say is that we can take responsibilities for our circumstances and choices.

And we can either do it our own way and go against the grain (His will) and still be successful.
Or surrender it all before God and take action in faith and be successful in His alignment.

You are in full control.
Don’t like something? What are you going to do about it?

Often times, we fall into a trap of helplessness.
“I can’t get a better job because no other job will hire me.”
When did you stop applying?

“I can’t quit my job because my job has great benefits.”
What are you willing to sacrifice for something potentially better?

“I only attract loser guys.”
What’s YOUR vibe? Are you confident? Are you happy? Do you have standards and do you measure up to your own standards? There’s a pattern to why you are dating the same kind of guys and you need to be introspective to know why. What are you going to do to end that cycle?

“I can’t afford therapy so I can’t heal.”
Welcome to 2019, the era of everything digital.
There are so many YouTube channels, podcasts, books, and audiobooks that are geared towards self-help.

It’s time to stop playing victim to your circumstances, rise up, and start making changes.

I’m not saying it’s easy. I’m not saying it’s pretty.
It’s a process. It’s a journey.

Sometimes, it’s painful.
Sometimes it’s harder than when you aren’t trying because you’ve invested time, money, and energy and you STILL feel like you aren’t going anywhere.

But trust me, even if you are moving one degree from your current path, you are making BIG changes in the trajectory of your life.
Every choice, every change, every action MATTERS.
Let THAT fuel you.


Shut that negative, helpless voice down and ask it, “So?” and let your inner-warrior take control.


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